three things you need to know when you want to trust the universe

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You know those moments when you feel like you’re working really hard and nothing’s happening? Those moments where the thing–you know, the thing you’ve been calling for, and has been calling you–just isn’t happening? And you keep hearing that you just gotta trust the universe, trust that it will all turn out, that the money will come.

You say to yourself: “I’ve been trusting. I’ve been trying to be patient, and letting go of the outcome, while at the same time holding my vision…”

And still…crickets.

Here’s 3 Things You Need to Know When you Want to Trust the Universe

1. Recognize the universe is in you.

Our strongest, most powerful connection to all of life, all the stars, all the cosmos, all that is around us and can guide us, is within us. So often, when we get caught up in thinking “I need to trust the universe,” we get caught up in thinking that some external force is going to swoop in and save us. In other words: we go straight to dependent, weak and disempowered. This kind of trusting the universe is like being Rapunzel, stuck in a tower with all that long hair, waiting for the prince to come and save her–when all along she coulda just tied the ends of her hair to the window frame and climbed down herself.

Yup, she would’ve had to lop off her hair once she got down there, because the ends would still be tied to the window frame. But she’d be outta there.

2. We gotta let go–but it’s about letting go of what prevents us from stepping up.

The thing is, in my experience, when we’re caught up in “I just gotta trust the universe” and hoping to be saved, we’re hanging onto more than a bunch of hair. We’re hanging onto ways we can continue to hide, ways we can avoid stepping up. Beliefs about our inabilities, and fears about what it might mean if we own our infinite capacity to create.

I hung on for dear life to beliefs about my inability to earn good money, until the day I explored all that and realized that one of the main reasons I was hanging onto that was because I was afraid of what I might need to take responsibility for if I owned my infinite capacity to create money. I’d have to take responsibility for my finances, for my future, for every time I said “I can’t afford that.” No more excuses. No more ducking and hiding. That, to me, was terrifying. Luckily, when the desire for change is larger than the desire to stay in our comfort zone, big things can happen. And they did for me.

3. Know this: The universe will serve, not please.

Oh boy it would make my day if somebody just handed me a cheque for a million dollars. Until I think about it this way: would that serve me? Would that enable me to really step into my powerful self, with an innate and infallible confidence in own abilities? Probably not.

It would really please me to get a bunch of free money.

But it wouldn’t serve me. What serves me is to learn that I can do it, to learn this step by step, determined to succeed, facing every fear and limiting belief, until I finally, with the universe at my back, realize I can get outta this damn tower myself, thank you very much.

To sum it all up:

The best way to trust the universe is to learn to trust yourself, letting go of what prevents you from stepping up, and knowing that the universe is loving you by serving you, even it that doesn’t please you.

Love. It all comes back to love–in the fiercest way possible.

Much love,


Mar 24, 2015 · Read More · Comment (1)

5 things people who succeed know to be true

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Dreamers and Doers

I talk with a lot of people who feel called. Not just dreamers, these are people who cannot imagine continuing on without listening to that something that is driving them and pulling them in another direction. Are you one of these people? Do you ever feel like the calling is too hard, or like giving up? You’re not alone.

I’ve been there. The people I talk with have been there.

And here are

5 Things that People Who Succeed Know to be True

1. Developmental psychology teaches that life keeps handing us the opportunity to grow as a human being. When we get pressed up against something that makes us feel like giving up, we’re being given the opportunity to choose something that will grow us, rather than shrink us back into our old, limited selves.
2. A more spiritual take is this: our unlimited, bright and shining soul is always leading the way. And at each juncture in our life that offers us up the choice between fear and love, we’re invited to continue to choose the one that takes us up and out of the lower rungs on the consciousness ladder. That is, to choose love instead of fear.
3. Resistance can be an indication we’re getting close to the end. We usually experience the most internal resistance–which can often show up as the inkling to give up–at the very beginning and when we’re close to the end. In other words, it can feel most tempting to give up when we’re very close to succeeding.
4. The change cycle helps us see that when things get hardest, we’re closest to success. The change cycle shows that in Square 3, right before Square 4–full flight–we hit the hardest times. The mantra for this square is: “This is harder than I thought it would be. And that’s ok.”
5. Thomas Edison tried over 1,000 times to create the lightbulb. The story goes: An interviewer said to Edison “Didn’t it bother you, failing that many times?” Edison said: “No. It wasn’t failing. It was just another try.” Failure is not something that might happen to you. Failure is how you will get there.

Something very exciting happened to me recently. I got my first rejection from a book publisher! The letter came in the mail. I was holding my breath. And then I read the lines “We’re very sorry, but you’re book isn’t a good fit for our roster at this time.” I started jumping up and down. Dancing around the living room. Singing at the top of my lungs.

James Patterson, America’s #1 best selling writer, had his first novel rejected 33 times. This is a story we hear over and over and over again–that people who have experienced great success have also experienced what others might consider failure.

So, when I got my first rejection letter I got excited. I didn’t think, “Oh, this book is terrible, I should give up.” I thought to myself: “The first hardest step is done. I’m getting even closer!” I just got my first rejection letter–this is so exciting!

Every successful writer has experienced rejection. Even more importantly, every successful writer continues to experience rejection. Failure is not something that might happen to you. Failure is how you will get there.

The people who succeed aren’t necessarily destined. They’re also determined.

Quotes on Success

I love this quote: “You must love the art in yourself more than yourself in the art.”

And this one, from Chris Gillebeau, The Happiness of Pursuit:
“You must believe that your quest can be successful, even if no one else does. You can deal with setbacks, misadventures, and even disasters as long as you still believe you can overcome the hardships and see your way to the end…

Whatever your quest, you, too, must believe…”

So you guys, don’t stop believing.

Much love,


Mar 17, 2015 · Read More · Comment

What to do When You Just Can’t Accept Yourself {guest post}

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Have you ever gotten caught up in believing that you just need to accept something about yourself or your experience that doesn’t feel right? Probably. Doesn’t everyone in the world of wellness and spirituality teach us to practice acceptance?

Well, if you’ve struggled with practicing the art of acceptance, then this article is for you. If you’ve found yourself frustrated or sad or angry time after time when trying to arrive at a place of acceptance, you aren’t flawed. Sometimes the advice to “just accept the way things are” doesn’t cut it.

Let me tell you a story:

Lacey was overwhelmed. A visionary entrepreneur with a business intended to transform the environment around her, she noticed she was falling into a tailspin when her four kids were all home together in the same room. She’d be helping one with her homework and the others would either be asking for attention and/or then fighting with each other. It was just too much for her.

My first response was to tell Lacey, “Well, that’s just the way it is.” I’m not unkind or callous. Accepting what is allows us to find flexibility and space in hard situations. It helps us not feel stuck.

That said, there was a “loud” silence as Lacey processed my response. We then talked some more about what was so bad about her experience. During the conversation, she discovered a connection to some old patterns and negative ways of thinking. Identifying this allowed Lacey to feel more empowered, and feel less bound up in the intensity of her current situation.

The next time we spoke about her home-life stress, Lacey admitted, “Now that I’ve found a way to be less reactive, my kids are less reactive.” This statement reflects what I see as a universal truth. Lacey had recognized her power, and by doing so, had transformed her reality.

Acceptance of “what is” just the first step. The next one is actively realizing our power to transform. To align with our power, we must stop identifying ourselves as victims. Then and only then can we make external changes that reflect what we deserve.

Five Steps

Here are five steps to go beyond acceptance when you’re in a difficult situation. You may just transform your reality …

1. Accept what is.

OK. I know I said that we’d go beyond acceptance, but this is just the first, preliminary step. Knowing that you are cultivating the practice of acceptance is not just a means to an end. You are making a choice to realize that something isn’t right for you. That is a truth, and one that you can accept. In doing so, you are making a choice to arrive at a place of greater empowerment, no longer waiting for something outside you to change.

2. Invite yourself to ask tough questions.

Specifically, ask yourself questions that have transformative potential. Specifically, ask yourself this: If I am the only person who can transform this situation, what does that change for me? If nobody besides you can bring you the outcome you desire, what does that mean? It means that you need to own your difficulty, and ask questions that you may not want to ask.

3. Align with your power.

What does this mean? Visualize yourself physically stepping into a place of strength. Know that your situation is happening for a reason. This is a little different from “just accepting.” It is realizing that difficulty is always an opportunity. You are facing challenges to help yourself realize your innate capacity to create new situations, and to strengthen your knowledge that this is always available to you.

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Mar 9, 2015 · Read More · Comment

how do I hold myself accountable?

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Feb 24, 2015 · Read More · Comment

not being busy does not mean you’re not worthy

Dearest you; I’ve been thinking of you. And your desire to be of service in the world, to make a difference, and live outside the box. Do you ever feel like it’s not happening fast enough? Like you should have a more packed calendar? Or that because you’re not as busy as you think you…

Feb 10, 2015 · Read More · Comment
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